Jody's Commentary About Good in Bed

~~~~~~~~~~My serenity corner at Jardines Studio



I told you already a little about how fun our May meeting was where we discusssed the book Good in Bed. My good friend Jody, who got sick and could not attend sent me this commentary by email. I think is histerical, smart and well written. Loved it, loved it, loved it! Enjoy!

Jody's Commentary About

Good in Bed

By

Jennifer Wiener

I would have LOVED to discuss that book! I wasn't so much judgmental of Cannie as I was of Jennifer Weiner's idea of plausibility - Cannie just happening to run into her obsession and his gf at the airport, the gf almost killing her unborn baby in the bathroom due to an overly dramatic shove, accompanying her movie star friend (whom she also just happened to run into/meet in a public restroom! ) to her plastic surgery office only to find out that her long-lost father works there!! And my personal favorite, having a hot, young, famous movie star fall for you INSTANTLY, with only your voice and wit to rouse his libido, your giant pregnant belly, extra lbs and mooning over your ex bf notwithstanding. I'm no fun, I know it. It doesn't take much to pull me out of the fantasy. To me though, even fantasy should make sense. B should follow A. There's a reason Harry Potter doesn't breakdance.

I also really wanted to know and was patiently waiting to find out why her father went from loving to horrible in such a short time. I really thought that was where the story was going. I thought understanding him and his motivations would give her some peace. There's seemingly no reason, no perspective, he's just turned evil one day. We have no understanding of his inner thoughts. Even if he never had the courage or inclination to tell her personally, which is so often the case with abusive parents, particularly male ones, she could have found out some other way, or, like most of us who've had less-than-ideal parents/childhoods eventually learn through the simple experience of life that our parents are only human. The reasons for their flaws and actions usually become obvious. At a minimum, if we don't come to understand the exact reason, we do come to understand that there IS one. Cannie never seems to get this. I don't mean to suggest she should have excused his behavior, I just would have felt more emotionally satisfied if she understood it, even if only intuitively, felt sad about it for a time and then released it. Like Bruce obsession, she never seems to release it. I know the father is not the protagonist and the ultimate lesson Cannie seems to learn is to love herself and not rely on others for her sense of esteem. I guess WHY he does what he does shouldn't be too important, but still I found the mystery of him distracting and her inability to resolve it, a little frustrating.

And YES, if Cannie Shapiro were my friend in real life, I think at some point, I'd run out of patience with her wailing and obsessive rantings. Her friends in the book never, ever seemed to. Isn't that unhealthy? Letting go is easier said than done, I realize, but isn't that part of a friend's job? To let you know when you're in the bell jar? To quote one of my favorite T.V. lines of all time " Were my friends right? Had a I crossed the line from pleasantly neurotic to annoyingly troubled? " The way I read it, Cannie had crossed that line at some point with the Bruce obsession and the way JW wrote those characters -- Cannie's friends -- in real life, they would have told her so.

Some of the positive aspects of the book, I think, were the realistic (mostly) telling of what it feels like to be a "larger woman" in this society (except for the part about movie stars falling for you) and Cannie's wit. She definitely was a very developed character. "Larger women" are generally not well represented in modern media, and even when they are, they are usually quite one dimensional and often sweet and jolly, kinda like Santa. My favorite scene was when they were at the fat clinic giving the skinny nurse a hard time. Any "larger woman" understands that the reason they were razzing her wasn't just for fun or due to jealousy of her svelte physique, but because of her assumption that the reason fat ppl are fat is because no one has ever told them that whole grains and fish are healthy and a 30 ounce steak is probably too large a portion. Whenever a thin person says these things to a heavy person, the not-so-subtle implication is that heavy ppl are rather dim, or at least just really, really sheltered from media:-) I mean these days, who really doesn't understand that refined sugar, saturated fat, sitting on your butt and eating 20,000 calories a day isn't healthy? NO ONE. That's why it's offensive and that's why they were giving her a hard time. I think the dynamic that causes fatness is a complicated one. It's kind of analogous to poverty. Telling fat ppl to eat healthier and less food is kind of like saying to a poor person "See, what you need to do is get more money". We all know WHAT we're supposed to eat and WHAT we're supposed to do, we just don't always do it, and the reasons are many and varied. Jennifer Weiner gets this point across beautifully.

Ok. PHEW, I feel better now :-) I really needed to "discuss" that book.

Jody